Lucé Tomlin-Brenner

Don't Rape Me

23 notes


Boglins, the monstrous hand puppets from the ’80s, have returned in this ten-minute vlog about watermelons.

I have had a pretty serious crush on this guy, Matt, since the internet was invented and he started my favorite website with a porno name that isn’t actually porno, X-Entertainment.  Now that site’s retired, Dinosaur Dracula is the new less sleazily titled place to be if you want to read earnestly clever reviews about novelty items with an emphasis on Halloween and Christmas themed curios. If Matt’s blog was a store, you could probably get a Mogwai there, or at least a dusty old can of Monster Blood. 

Getting back to this super serious crush…as a girl with lots of love to give to people I only know through a screen, I can say with a bit of authority, that stranger crushes are often a let down. Lots of people that seem cool in the vague ways you “know” them, are actually heinous let downs (ALEXIS BLEDEL I’M LOOKING STRAIGHT AT YOU GIRL) and it takes all the energy you have to try to remember them only as Rory Gilmore -er uh- whoever they were to you to begin with. 

So imagine my delight when I got to watch Matt speak for the first time ever (in this here video) after reading his blog for 10 years(ish) and he’s as sincere and enjoyable as his boundlessly entertaining writing makes him out to be. What a rare and refreshing revelation! Rs! Usually reserved for angerrrr, my Rs today are for RRRReverly! 

It should be noted that this isn’t the most entertaining video ever for most people probably. Do you think we have a lot in common? If not, you won’t guffaw and awww as much as I did when you watch this.  But if you like a guy that is quietly fervid with a dash of self-consciousness than this video is for you. The way he abandons his watermelon jack-o-lantern carving idea, only to return to it with half-steam, and then has thinly veiled contempt for the final product made me swoon enough to re-post and expound on it. 

Here’s to not being a let down! 

(Source: mummyshark)

Filed under boglins nostalgia 80s 90s favorite fandom cyber crush internet crush

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    I have had a pretty serious crush on this guy, Matt, since the internet was invented and he started my favorite website...
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    These videos are the first time that I have ever heard your normal voice and you sound exactly the way that I had...
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